Of Mending a Broken Heart...

A few weeks ago a very dear friend of mine had his heart broken to the tiniest bits in the most callous & cruel manner...

The sheer agony in his voice made me cry... it is something we have all felt.. the pang of physical pain that comes with being hurt & betrayed by the person one has decided to give everything to.

The betrayal does not have to be physical in nature.... it doesn't have to be outright cheating for the heart to break... heart break comes from emotional violation. It happens after you have let all your guard down, moved those walls to let one person in. THAT one person; the one you think of first thing in the morning, the one that makes you smile for no real reason when you are alone with your thoughts, the one that makes you laugh, the one that can fix anything by just being there.

This one person that appeals to your subconscience so much that you without thinking go against your own experience and self preservation mechanism and accomodate them in your emotional being.

It isn't about finding out that the person isn't all that (you probably gave them too much credit anyway & deitified them more than you should have... but then you knew that when you were doing it) ... they weren't all that when you met them... it is about realising that all of a sudden your own state of well being, either physical or emotional, is linked to another person and that the person doesn't feel the same way...

When you realise that you will never be ALL that to the other person that you gave nearly everything to... that is when your heart breaks...

The upside... you can only mend it when it is broken.. before that you are just in a state of limbo, waiting & hoping that things will change...

Catchup.

It been a really long time since the last time I posted... to be precise - end of November.

Its not like I haven't had reason or inspiration to blog... just so much stuff has been happening in a whirl wind manner that didn't allow for enough time to put together a coherent thought.

I've been working ridiculous hours by my current jobs' standards. I'm sleep deprived doing a job I'm not really into in the first place... yes I like it, but not enough to actually justify being sleep deprived by it.

I so desperately need a vacation... specially after ALL my nye plans bombed...my well laid summer plans to go to New York city & visit Aman was sinking ship by the time november rolled around but then there is always the evergreen back plan called Goa.... that bummed out as well... and then were the plans to go to Bali end of March... yeah... thats plan looks like it is on it's way out as well.... from the looks of it I don't think I'm getting repsite till June......

oooooooo... that is so far away..I can barely see the light... hehehehe...


Other than work and bombed holiday plans, I've been partying lots... there always is something... weekend , mid-week, start of week..... there perpetually is something that doesn't allow me to get my full quota of sleep on any given night...

And then there was Ishaan's wedding... which was fun... I will spare the details. It suffices to say I'm happy for both of them and it was one of the few weddings that happened for the right reasons. Atleast in my opinion.

For the fact that it has been a really long time that I haven't put up a post ..i really don't have much to say about the stuff that been happenning..... maybe its because I have met a bunch of interesting people over the las few weeks that I can conversations with about the stuff I ideally have posted.....

:)